Monday, June 18, 2012

Book A Ticket, And Just Leave

I found these two photos on Pinterest a while back, and since then I have come back to it so many times.

I feel like when I found it online, It was like the answer to all my questions. I have been back home for only a month and a half now, and my heart is already straying away. I have left this place so many times now it seems, whether it be for a day, a week, a month, a year, but I always seem to come back. In January of 2011 I left home, I moved to a beach town about 3 hours away. It wasn't far, but it was somewhere new.

I returned home early November 2011 and left once again in December to South Carolina for about a month visiting Florida somewhere in between. The day I was scheduled to depart, on January 13 2012 my uncle passed away and it gave me such an odd feeling about going back. 3 weeks later, I left again from February to May. I came back home, and felt so out of place.

Although not much, there are a few reasons this place pulls me back in. Some of my favorite places to eat and shop are here, and in the East Coast they were no where to be found in the surrounding areas of where I had been.

And the main reason is my Grandmother. She is like my mom and I am very close to her, and no one else in my family really is, except for my uncle who had passed away. I feel almost obligated to stay here because of her. One of her neighbors, a childhood friend said to me,

"You know they say that San Antonio is the one place you always come back to, like people in the military will say they have been all over the world, yet they still want to come back to San Antonio, even if it's not where they grew up "

That stuck in my head, because it's true for me, I always, always, come back. But part of me just wants to go away, flee this town and never return, or if I do return just keep it for a short while. I do love San Antonio, it has a lot to offer, and I do love Texas. Texas is my home, and it always will be, but I crave new places, different people, different life. (I guess that's why I keep getting told to join the Air Force)

My boyfriend is flying down in 4 days and I'm sure I will have a lot to discuss with him, maybe I will leave again for a while, but come back next year. I'm not sure, but I feel like this thought is always on my mind. I feel like this place is no longer my home, and I no longer belong here, I am constantly wanting to be somewhere else.

These two photos have fit my thoughts and feelings so perfectly for a while now.

Is this just a Piscean thing?


  1. There's absolutely nothing strange with wanting to see other places, not even if it's all the time. I suppose the beauty of this whole thing is that you can travel all over the world, and you know that you have San Antonio to return to. So go crazy! There aren't any rules as to how and where to live your life - home is where the heart is. I miss having that freedom, I'm a little stuck now as my son is only 5 months old, but as soon as he's old enough we'll go traveling the world to our hearts content. Before I had him and before I met my husband I would travel around in Europe as much as I could afford and it's lovely to be able to return home. And you have loads of time to go there and back again :)

    1. Thanks so much for reading Emelie, I do hope to travel the world some day, right now I think I will just stay small but hopefully I will have a family that will want to travel along with me someday. Aw, well I am sure your son will have much more fun when he is older and able to maybe recollect those memories later on in life. Traveling Europe sounds so fun, I hope someday to go there, to all the big towns and small towns!